Perfect Side Eye

There’s a weird lump of bone on my toe joint that has to have been on scans, even if it was small, unless it rose up like a magical weed after the scans were completed. Wait, if a certain magical weed were legal for chronic pain I might be less bitter about medical professionals stringing me along. Ba dum tiss. 

I have all the symptoms of Hallux Rigidus now, which is basically arthritis. Except I’m crazy and my pain has nothing to do with what’s in my foot, but the nerves in my back. Right. Picture a perfect side eye and you’ll come a quarterway to how I feel about this. 

My evaluation appointment for the implant isn’t for a month. Am I really supposed to wait that long? Then again, if I let it worsen some more they’ll pay more attention. What self-approving medical professional wants to treat a smallish problem? 

I’m gonna look crazy if I go see Dr S again, or any of the other people I’ve seen about this, for that matter. Maybe I should go see my primary, and ask her what to do. I want to for the constant fatigue, anyways, and see if maybe I get a different response than “Walk around more.”

Tomorrow I have an appointment with somebody from an organization that helps disabled people get jobs, because unrelenting pain isn’t a disability. I can’t do anything distracting like read, knit, or write but for somewhere between a few and twenty minutes, but I can totally show up for people to pay me to be able to concentrate.